Ephesians 4

I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. (Eph. 4:1–3)

Paul lists four virtues believers should cultivate as a way to pursue unity in the church: humility, gentleness, patience, and long-suffering. The first, “humility,” or lowliness, characterizes a person who puts others before themself. Like Christ, who “humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death” (Phil. 2:8), we serve others at cost to ourselves. 

“Gentleness,” or meekness, characterizes someone who treats others with kindness and avoids harshness and bitterness. Like Christ, who is “gentle and lowly in heart” (Matt. 11:29), we welcome others and are tender toward them. 

“Patience” and “bearing with one another in love” (Eph. 4:2) are related and characterize someone who endures the weaknesses and forgives the sins of others. Like the Lord, who is “slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love and faithfulness” (Ex. 34:6), we show love to others, even when we’ve been wronged. 

As the Ephesians increasingly practice these virtues (or what Christians often call “graces”), Paul urges them to be “eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (Eph. 4:3). Believers don’t create unity in the church; that’s a reality secured by the Spirit. God already broke down “the dividing wall of hostility” and created “in himself one new man in place of the two, so making peace” (2:14, 15). But that doesn’t diminish our responsibility to “maintain” what God has accomplished. 

By our Spirit-empowered efforts at humility, gentleness, patience, and long-suffering, we eagerly foster “the bond of peace” that sustains the unity God created. Mopping the floors and recaulking the shower don’t build the house, but they prevent decay and make it a pleasant place to call home. In the church, our loving interactions with one another are the routine maintenance God’s household needs to be a place where everyone can live well together.
Megan Hill is the author of several books, including Praying Together; A Place to Belong; and Meg Is Not Alone. She also serves as the managing editor for the Gospel Coalition. A pastor’s wife and a pastor’s daughter, she lives in Massachusetts with her husband and four children, where they belong to West Springfield Covenant Community Church (PCA).